"Alex did you scratch Stan?"
"Yes"
"Did you get sent to the office?"
"Yes"
"Was he picking on you?"
"Yes"
Time out. He's saying yes to everything. Let's try something....
"Alex did Stan steal your giraffe?"
"Yes"
"Did he make you wear clown makeup?"
"Yes"
Later that night....
"Alex, who did you scratch?"
"Stan"
"And what happened?"
"Big trouble go to the office"
"Right. So are you going to scratch Stan again tomorrow?"
"Yeeeeessssss"
Thursday, November 15, 2012
Wednesday, November 14, 2012
A Wealth Of Elf On The Shelf
Every year around this time we pull out the good'ole Elf On The Shelf in hopes of keeping the kids off Santa's Naughty List. The way the story goes is that the Elf (ours is named Flash) watches over the boys each day and every night he visits Santa to report what's he's witnessed. He's a very mischievous little thing so in the mornings it's always a sure bet that he will be found digging in the snack bowl, riding in Spider-Man's car, or wrestling with the Incredible Hulk. It's a well known fact that if a person touches the Elf he losses all his magic and will never be able to tell Santa all the good deeds he's witnessed.
Last night the "Elf" was playing in Adams room and he apparently left it in a huge mess. In his defense the "Elf" was trying to invite the Hulk to play and it was very dark in Adams room. The "Elf" promises to do a better job covering his tracks going forward.
Last night the "Elf" was playing in Adams room and he apparently left it in a huge mess. In his defense the "Elf" was trying to invite the Hulk to play and it was very dark in Adams room. The "Elf" promises to do a better job covering his tracks going forward.
Tuesday, November 13, 2012
Tele-revisionist History
I was telling a story today. The story of our 56" projection screen television going out overnight, when I was suddenly hit by another story I had long forgotten.
It too involved a television and while the details and exact date may be off a month or two, it's a good story just the same. Mandy was just days away from having Adam and was ready to pop. We woke up that morning like any other, me preparing to head to work at Anderson Press and Mandy facing another long day of bed rest. As you may have guessed the television had gone out.
Now normally a TV hitting the skids wouldn't be considered an emergency, but we are talking about a very pregnant very uncomfortable mother of a soon to be born 8 lb bouncing baby boy. Doing what any other good husband would do I heeded my wife's request when she pleaded " I cannot sit here in this bed all day and stare at the walls. You have to do something." So that morning at 6:30 AM I found myself at Walmart looking to buy whatever television they had on sale.
As I mentioned today I found myself in a similar situation, waking up to find the television had gone out. And wouldn't you know that same TV purchased some six years ago is now being called back to active duty.
On second though this really wasn't the best story.....
It too involved a television and while the details and exact date may be off a month or two, it's a good story just the same. Mandy was just days away from having Adam and was ready to pop. We woke up that morning like any other, me preparing to head to work at Anderson Press and Mandy facing another long day of bed rest. As you may have guessed the television had gone out.
Now normally a TV hitting the skids wouldn't be considered an emergency, but we are talking about a very pregnant very uncomfortable mother of a soon to be born 8 lb bouncing baby boy. Doing what any other good husband would do I heeded my wife's request when she pleaded " I cannot sit here in this bed all day and stare at the walls. You have to do something." So that morning at 6:30 AM I found myself at Walmart looking to buy whatever television they had on sale.
As I mentioned today I found myself in a similar situation, waking up to find the television had gone out. And wouldn't you know that same TV purchased some six years ago is now being called back to active duty.
On second though this really wasn't the best story.....
Monday, November 12, 2012
Cane & Able
So much for resolutions. Waaaay back in January I promised to post everyday, a promise I kept until recently. October was hard on us as a family and in particular myself as a person. We were all sick with various illnesses ranging from the normal everyday sinus infection to the more dire pneumonia (Adam). To say we were missing in action would be an understatement. We missed church, work, school, soccer games, Fun Fest, football games, a catfish fry, and everyone in between as we spent weeks locked inside fighting for survival. I even spent four days walking around with a cane thanks to a bum ankle that started hurting out of no where and thankfully disappeared the same way.
By the time it was all over I had changed without even realizing it. I'd become bitter. Selfish. I was a jerk and generally unpleasant person to be around. I withdrew from the world content with feelings of misery and self depreciation. My children were affected and so was my marriage. I gained 15 pounds and all I wanted in life was my couch, my remote, and a bag of cookies.
Not everything was gloom and doom. Don't get me wrong. There were good times...Adam was convinced a character in one of his books was called Butt Bunny on the same night Alex went around the house looking in people's underwear determined to prove it wasn't him that was dirty....Alex took after a little boy at the soccer field who in his mind was the real life Little Bill...Adam feel in love with soccer...and together dressed as Dracula and Iron Man, Adam & Alex enjoyed a very happy Halloween.
All the good aside though somewhere along the way I sorta lost myself a bit. I'm back now. I feel good and the fog has cleared. I know what's important again and they will never doubt how much they mean to me. What can I say other than I'm only human. There was only one perfect person and he died so that I may live. I pray I get to thank him in person for his sacrifice one day.
By the time it was all over I had changed without even realizing it. I'd become bitter. Selfish. I was a jerk and generally unpleasant person to be around. I withdrew from the world content with feelings of misery and self depreciation. My children were affected and so was my marriage. I gained 15 pounds and all I wanted in life was my couch, my remote, and a bag of cookies.
Not everything was gloom and doom. Don't get me wrong. There were good times...Adam was convinced a character in one of his books was called Butt Bunny on the same night Alex went around the house looking in people's underwear determined to prove it wasn't him that was dirty....Alex took after a little boy at the soccer field who in his mind was the real life Little Bill...Adam feel in love with soccer...and together dressed as Dracula and Iron Man, Adam & Alex enjoyed a very happy Halloween.
All the good aside though somewhere along the way I sorta lost myself a bit. I'm back now. I feel good and the fog has cleared. I know what's important again and they will never doubt how much they mean to me. What can I say other than I'm only human. There was only one perfect person and he died so that I may live. I pray I get to thank him in person for his sacrifice one day.
Sunday, October 07, 2012
The Most Difficult Letter In The Alphabet
Why?
As a parent it's the toughest question to answer. One that I get asked nearly every single day.
Why do we not have cats anymore?
Why are the clouds all smushed together?
Why did they say mean things to me?
Half the time you don't know why yourself. You either give them the standard one word answer because or you give it your best shot and hope they buy it.
The cats were called to heaven.
Those are winter clouds. Summer clouds are more fluffy and spread further apart.
Sometimes people say mean things to make themselves feel better.
I don't think we ever stop asking the question of why things happen or are what they are.
Why can't I ever get ahead?
Why did I just not keep my mouth shut instead of hurting her feelings?
Why am I always so tired?
Sometimes the answers are right in front of your face....
It's just not my time. With hard work comes great reward.
Because being honest is part of my DNA. I can never lie no matter what.
Maybe it has something to do with staying up all night and eating junk food.
These are the easy ones though...it's the tough ones that keep you up at night.
Why do people have to die?
Why does God let bad things happen?
As a parent these are the ones you dread hearing because in all honesty they are the ones you ask yourself late at night when it's just you, the ticking of the clock, and complete and utter darkness.
"For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life."
It's hard to explain faith to a child. It's not always easy to grasp it as an adult. We do though...we tie ourselves to it in hopes our faith will drag us out of despair and into the bright shining light of Heaven above.
Why? I don't why. What I do know is that there is an all powerful God above who has plans for his people and all we have to do is believe.
Hebrews 10:22
"let us draw near to God with a sincere heart in full assurance of faith, having our hearts sprinkled to cleanse us from a guilty conscience and having our bodies washed with pure water."
As a parent it's the toughest question to answer. One that I get asked nearly every single day.
Why do we not have cats anymore?
Why are the clouds all smushed together?
Why did they say mean things to me?
Half the time you don't know why yourself. You either give them the standard one word answer because or you give it your best shot and hope they buy it.
The cats were called to heaven.
Those are winter clouds. Summer clouds are more fluffy and spread further apart.
Sometimes people say mean things to make themselves feel better.
I don't think we ever stop asking the question of why things happen or are what they are.
Why can't I ever get ahead?
Why did I just not keep my mouth shut instead of hurting her feelings?
Why am I always so tired?
Sometimes the answers are right in front of your face....
It's just not my time. With hard work comes great reward.
Because being honest is part of my DNA. I can never lie no matter what.
Maybe it has something to do with staying up all night and eating junk food.
These are the easy ones though...it's the tough ones that keep you up at night.
Why do people have to die?
Why does God let bad things happen?
As a parent these are the ones you dread hearing because in all honesty they are the ones you ask yourself late at night when it's just you, the ticking of the clock, and complete and utter darkness.
"For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life."
It's hard to explain faith to a child. It's not always easy to grasp it as an adult. We do though...we tie ourselves to it in hopes our faith will drag us out of despair and into the bright shining light of Heaven above.
Why? I don't why. What I do know is that there is an all powerful God above who has plans for his people and all we have to do is believe.
Hebrews 10:22
"let us draw near to God with a sincere heart in full assurance of faith, having our hearts sprinkled to cleanse us from a guilty conscience and having our bodies washed with pure water."
Tuesday, October 02, 2012
I Have Moments
Life isn't always fair. I don't always get what I want. I don't travel more than a few miles a month. I've never been on an airplane. Never left the South. I have moments where I want to scream at the top of my lungs.
I won't make a million bucks this year. I sit at a desk from 8:00 until 5:00 and I'm proud just to have a job. I don't have a fancy car. I get three weeks of vacation each year and I've worked my tail off to get it.
I eat sandwiches for lunch five days a week. Date night always ends with a trip to Target. The majority of my clothes come from the clearance rack. My shoes cost eight dollars.
Life isn't always fair. I don't always get what I want...but I've got a little boy that loves to give wet hugs after bath time. A first grader that will never realize how funny he truly is. A wife that always takes my breathe away with her laughter and sweet kisses.
My house is more often then not full of music, dancing, and silliness. Every morning I take my boys to school, meet then at the door that afternoon, and tuck them into bed each night.
Life isn't always fair. I don't always get what I want. I don't travel more than a few miles a month. I've never been on an airplane. Never left the South. Yet none of that matters because I have moments where all I can do is hold my breath and thank God for blessing me with so much love.
I won't make a million bucks this year. I sit at a desk from 8:00 until 5:00 and I'm proud just to have a job. I don't have a fancy car. I get three weeks of vacation each year and I've worked my tail off to get it.
I eat sandwiches for lunch five days a week. Date night always ends with a trip to Target. The majority of my clothes come from the clearance rack. My shoes cost eight dollars.
Life isn't always fair. I don't always get what I want...but I've got a little boy that loves to give wet hugs after bath time. A first grader that will never realize how funny he truly is. A wife that always takes my breathe away with her laughter and sweet kisses.
My house is more often then not full of music, dancing, and silliness. Every morning I take my boys to school, meet then at the door that afternoon, and tuck them into bed each night.
Life isn't always fair. I don't always get what I want. I don't travel more than a few miles a month. I've never been on an airplane. Never left the South. Yet none of that matters because I have moments where all I can do is hold my breath and thank God for blessing me with so much love.
Wednesday, September 26, 2012
The Battle Of Jonah Hill
You just don't know how many posts get written that end up deleted after they are done. I pour my heart and soul out on Charlie. I always want to be honest and cover the tough parenting issues while at the same time share the joys of living life. Realistically though not every conversation needs to be shared and as much as I hate to admit it not every problem needs to be blasted on the Internet.
What I will say about today's title is that kids don't always get along with each other and there are times when they need to defend themselves from being taken advantage. I do not encourage fighting but I also do not want my children to live through the pain that I did by being bullied during certain times in my life by adults and other kids.
There is a fine line between walking away from a fight and being taken advantage of because it appears you don't have the courage to throw a punch every now and then.
What I will say about today's title is that kids don't always get along with each other and there are times when they need to defend themselves from being taken advantage. I do not encourage fighting but I also do not want my children to live through the pain that I did by being bullied during certain times in my life by adults and other kids.
There is a fine line between walking away from a fight and being taken advantage of because it appears you don't have the courage to throw a punch every now and then.
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